Back in the 18th Century, ships coming into Bristol Harbor, England were damaged by tidal patterns. It was important for crews to clean up their act -- make the ship tidy and neat, batten down the hatches and more or less prepare for a secure docking. Being ship-shape was not a one-and-done-type-preparation. It required constant attention and continuous effort to maintain.
Being 'ship-shape' is an important component in relationships, also.
Relationships don't just drift along without effort. They need nurturing and constant attention. They are precious -- and have to be built slowly and carefully -- with respect and compromise. Your 'relationship won't sail' if you don't keep up with it.
Sailing through relationships is the easy part. But the ship always needs maintenance and repair, and that's when things often get difficult.
Like I always say:
"The only thing you have to do to make good things go bad . . . . . is nothing.
Building relationships is not about keeping a checklist. It's about a slow walk into uncomfortable discussions. It's about patience, understanding and acceptance.
When you each have the same goal, communication is essential!
• Be quick to listen, and slow to judge.
• Be willing to discuss differences in a positive way.
• Leave out personal offensive comments. Remember, when you have a hole in your boat, it's best not to drill another hole to let the first one drain.
• Be candid. Honest. Open.
• Make sure the other person in the discussion is able to walk away with dignity.
Great relationships are not great because they have no problems. Great relationships are built by people who care enough about the other person to make it work!
Happily-ever-after is not a conclusion. It's a direction!
After all . . . . we're all in the same boat.
Bon Voyage!
